Chronic Negress

Helio San Miguel leads the wine classes at the Cervantes Institute with a dash of philosophy, some film recommendations and a delicious sense of humor. This class, which was held on Dec. 4 and Nov. 28, highlighted 12 wines crafted by female winemakers in Spain. Helio offered some hilarious generalizations about “feminine” wines being more rounded, elegant and sophisticated while “masculine” wines were brawnier, more belligerent and whatnot. I half expected him to say that the female winemakers had to take one week a month off from wine-making decisions because their hormones were getting the best of them. He didn’t, but did ask why he had more women in his introductory classes than men, We pondered that for a while, and then went through a 12-wine flight of girls having fun with grapes. In the spirit of the staircase, I think there are more women in the introductory classes because women like the idea of a class structure where men will just go out, buy wine and bang out a hierarchy the same way they repair drywall — shoddily with no thought to aesthetics. Fight amongst yourselves. As for the wines,  my favorite was the 2006 Can Blau from Montsant, a a blend of Garnacha, Cabernet Sauvignon, Mazuelo and Syrah. This is a  “feminine” wine but in the best sense of elegance and suppleness. It’s also about $20 a bottle, and is a much better value than some of the wines from the neighboring Priorat region. The worst wine hands down was the 2003 Torres Milmanda, an engineered oak bomb Chardonnay that will set you back about 50 clams. It’s extremely popular in Spain, but I like to think the Spaniards know they are drinking a parody of some California Chardonnay. This  wine is neither masculine nor feminine; it’s just bad. Also worth seeking out is the 2004 Elias Mora Crianza from Toro, which needs some time to mature fully but could grow into something pretty fabulous. Heilo is teaching classes at the Institute through June and you can drop by or check out the lineup here. Click on the wine seminars to see the lineup. Word to the wise: During the tastings, no one talks about the wine, but any and all political subjects are fair game and offered with a malicious spirit. If this kind of thing offends you, just drink and don’t say much.