The Negress managed not to attend a convention this week. The decision was mostly financial. However, she’s seen the same spoke come up on the wheel more times than she’s had hot dinners. Her former profession is big on conventions, which is a chuckle since it’s not exactly a growth industry these days. Also, some of the truisms apply to other conventions for other professions. Anyway, without further ado.
1. A convention should not be confused with a con, although interview suits can be considered a type of cosplay.
2. Back in the day at journalism conventions, there was a recruiting area. For jobs. Really. The Negress used to refer to said area as The Killing Floor since it was usually where dreams went to die. If you want unpaid internships, they have those. So, basically, no lower-middle-class or poor people can enter the profession now. Talk about a lack of perspective.
3. If a panel is early, it’s usually interesting. Last of the day? Not so much.
4. At some conventions, foxhole friendships can be formed. For example, you might spend three days of a four-day convention with a running buddy that you do not think about, or communicate with, for the intervening year before you do it all over again.
5. If you have attended a convention in Chicago at the McCormick Center and didn’t learn the No. 3 bus schedule, you had a miserable time. There’s a city out there.
6. All of the important work at conventions usually gets done in the bar.
7. If your convention is in a hotel and there is a meal function (lunch is usually the cheapest and is a requirement that comes with the room block), observe the banquet waiters. They are a well-oiled machine.This will give you something to do to take your mind off the food in front of you.
8. There will always be someone in attendance at any convention that will complain about the price of hotel food and long for a close-by McDonald’s. While spendy hotel food is problematic, just about every city worth its salt should have a local spot nearby where a reasonably priced breakfast or lunch can be acquired. If you wanted to eat McDonald’s, why did you leave home?
9, If you go to a convention and don’t ditch some of the programming to explore the city, what’s wrong with you?
10. The Negress once attended a convention at a decrepit New York hotel where a 5 by 8 section of the ceiling just missed falling on one of her fellow convention-goers. On second thought, maybe lunch isn’t all that bad.